F – 2001 – 16 – Ohio

Date: Author: Category: 15-16, consensual, Female, in a relationship, Midwest

I lost my virginity on 9/11/2001. It was to my boyfriend at the time, and in my house, in the evening as President Bush addressed the nation. The world was coming to an end, and it was the way I thought I needed to be comforted, and how he needed me to comfort him.

I had always been a sexual person, even as a child, and I am a little shocked it happened so “late” in my sexual maturity. I was always very aware of human sexuality as a kid. I have a vivid memory from when I was about 5 years old of knowing that pregnant women were overtly sexual. I would put a balloon under my shirt and feel pretty…but more than pretty. Looking back on it now, I know that what I felt was sexy, but without having the language to call it that. My mother and I had the “talk” when I was in 4th grade because she gathered that I was aware of sex without knowing the details.

 It was awful as virginity experiences usually are, however there was no pain; other than knowing that after that day nothing would ever be the same. It was a negative experience in that it involved a lot of fumbling, neither of us really knowing what we were doing, and a lack of pleasure on my side. I think it lasted all of five minutes and afterwards I was unimpressed with the act of sex. I’m fairly certain I thought to myself “that was it?” Only after a few years, and when I was finally having sex with someone I was in love with did I finally realize that it can be a completely fulfilling sexual experience.

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